Parenting Book Chapters That Didn’t Make The Cut


One of my favorite things to say about this parenting gig is: “this wasn’t in the parenting book!!” In honor of all the twists and turns that come along with parenting, here are a few chapters that would have been really helpful. 

  1. How Many Applesauce Pouches Are Too Many? Spoiler alert: The limit does not exist 
  2. When Did My Pre-teen Suddenly Turn Into An Extra From The Exorcist? A guide for tween proofing your home.
  3. Why Are You So Obsessed With Me; Parenting the Velcro Child.
  4. How To Cover Up Scratches and Cuts On School Picture Day: A Parent’s Guide to Contouring and Cover-Up for the Preschool Crowd.
  5. Convincing Lies to Tell Your Pediatrician About Screen Time Limits; New for 2019, How to Get Your Big Kid to Go Along With Your Tall Tales
  6. How to Cut Your Toddler’s Nails Without Drawing Blood (Flip to page 20 for a pull-out coupon for band-aids)
  7. Purging the Toy Room; Tips for Sneaking Toys Out Unnoticed. Author’s preamble of how to survive Ikea storage unit shopping available for all e-books.
  8. How Long Do I Have to Keep Their School “Artwork”? 
  9. Mastering the Mom Reach; How to Find That Perfect Angle to Hand Off a Snack to the Backseat. 
  10. Best Tips for Navigating the Sign-up Sheet So You Can Get Paper Goods”. 

What are some chapters that you could have really benefited from?